Holy teary sobfest.  Maybe I’ve gone soft, but this show is amazing.

Here’s the skinny:

MTV has partnered with a youth outreach non-profit group called Challenge Day (challengday.org), that runs a 1-day workshop at schools all over the country, to encourage kids to start playing nice.  After meeting a few of the kids, we go inside the program and watch as they unload their emotional baggage.

Verdict:

It’s The Breakfast Club for the new age.  Old friends make amends, bullies apologize, outcasts find a common ground they never knew existed and tough guys reveal their many layers.

The real challenge though, is the day after.  The kids are tasked with spreading the gospel, lessons that are pretty basic, but easily forgotten when trapped in the social experiment that is high school:  Be nice to people.  Don’t judge a person until you’ve walked in their shoes.  Words can hurt.

Normally, I’d be pretty wary of a show like this.  But given recent events that have taken place in the “adult” arena, I don’t think it hurts to provide some people at home with a tutorial on the basics of human decency.  I’ve only seen the first two episodes, but I cried like a little bitch.

Programming win, MTV.  Programming win.

About six months ago someone told me that Joan Rivers was going to make a documentary. My initial question was, haven’t we already seen the Joan Rivers documentary throughout her career? Six months later, after seeing the documentary “Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work”, I received the answer to my question. No.

Sure, we have seen Joan go through many plastic surgery debacles. Yes, we have seen her quick and brutal humor. And, yes we have seen her controversial moments; whether getting banned from the red carpet or her “back in the spotlight” win on Celebrity Apprentice.

What we didn’t know, and what we get a glimpse into, is the real Joan. You know the volunteering; calendar hoarding, crying (whining at times) Joan. There truly are many real Ah ha moments that show just how real Joan is. For instance:

Joan Rivers was brutally shut out of her friend Johnny Carson’s life with one phone call.

Joan Rivers had to say goodbye to a friend and business partner for over 40 years, the only person who knew all of her history.

Joan Rivers is insecure, which Melissa (Joan’s daughter) clearly points out many times.

Most important, Joan Rivers wants to be accepted. In order to fulfill this need, Joan fills her schedule with back to back performances and events. Even if the occasion isn’t relevant, Joan has a need to be accepted. And lets be honest, who doesn’t want to be accepted?

Joan Rivers is really like everyone else. The only difference is she knows how to laugh about it. How many of us can truly say we find the humor in the pain and insecurities of life, so much so they can make a living off of it?

If you are looking for laughs, tears, and plastic surgery this is a documentary you don’t want to miss.

All productivity today went to a screeching halt after seeing the second teaser trailer for “The Social Network” (see it on NYMag’s blog HERE and note that JCPE and I are the only commenters). At the ripe old age of 28 I am not in any way mature enough to watch a movie with Justin in it without my heart fluttering and my palms sweating. I actually wanted to see “The Social Network” but I feel like JT will break the 4th wall for me (like a 555 number, but handsomer and with perfect pitch). Momentarily blindsided by love pangs I swung over to imdb and found something magical. I’ll let this one speak for itself:

Jellystone Park has been losing business, so greedy Mayor Brown decides to shut it down and sell the land. That means families will no longer be able to experience the natural beauty of the outdoors — and, even worse, Yogi and Boo Boo will be tossed out of the only home they’ve ever known. Faced with his biggest challenge ever, Yogi must prove that he really is “smarter than the average bear” as he and Boo Boo join forces with their old nemesis Ranger Smith to find a way to save Jellystone Park from closing forever.

Awesome.

The central umbrella of discipline in the world of TLA is called Bending, the ability to manipulate an element. There are 4 main types of bending: Airbending, Earthbending, Waterbending and Firebending, each based on a specific real-world martial art. Much like anything else, bending can be used for good or evil — Firebenders can warm cold tea, or they can burn down a village, Earthbenders can dig ditches, or they can create small earthquakes, etc.

The film’s story itself felt very rushed, to the point where it felt like I was just learning the story and then the climax occurred. This is because they tried to cram 500 minutes of story into 103 minutes. By doing so, Shyamalan effectively lost the spirit of the series. Quite a few key points from Book One were also absent from the movie. For instance, the Kyoshi Warriors that play a major role later on in the animated series were left almost completely out. Some people feel that the adaptation should have been in the form of a television series portrayed by real live people.

Myself and many other “fans” of the animated series do not agree with the changes that were made. One of the changes that’s really grated on everyone’s nerves is the pronunciation of a lot of the characters names. It’s so far off. For example, the main character’s name should be pronounced “Ang”, not “Ahng” like it is in the movie.

The other change that really bothered me is that the Firebenders needed pre-existing fire to bend it. This change makes sense as water, air and earth are everywhere, but fire is not. You cannot control something that isn’t there, so in order to control fire, you need to already have it. However, this isn’t true to the source material. In the animated series, Firebenders can create fire from their movements, without needing a pre-existing fire.

The bending motions in the film were every bit as intense martial arts should be, although they did tend to take too long, specifically Earth. There were a few times where I saw prolonged motions without any Bending. I was like “Uh, guys, what are you doing?”

Casting was pretty good, as was the dialogue, aside from pronunciation. Mind you, this was the first time that I had seen any of the castmembers’ work. Noah Ringer (Aang), Dev Patel (Zuko), and Jackson Rathbone (Sokka) all portrayed their characters well. Rathbone in particular played Sokka well: funny, sarcastic, and a bit of a goof. But in my opinion, the best performance would have to be that of Shaun Toub. He really nailed the role of Uncle Iroh, very knowledgeable but extremely easy-going and friendly. The worst is Nicola Peltz, who played Katara, she wasn’t anything like her animated counterpart! She completely butchered the outgoing, cautious, and stubborn character from the animated series.

Locations and costumes were very true to the series. From the Air Temples to the Northern Water Tribe. The only thing I would change is that Zuko’s burn needed to be more defined, although I’m not sure if that’s even possible, given Patel’s complexion in the movie.

As a fan of the series, I wasn’t all that impressed with The Last Airbender. It missed some major points in the story that needed to be delved into, rather than just mentioned in passing. About the only thing the film is good for is a children’s action movie. You do not want to see this film if you have any shred of respect for the animated series. Several people that I know have gone on and on about how the movie could’ve been done so much better. Let’s hope that if and when they do another movie, that they kick M. Night Shyamalan in the balls with a nice fat paycheck and tell him to leave “his life’s work” alone.

The Last Airbender was produced, written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan. It is based on Avatar: The Last Airbender, created by Michael Dante DiMartino and Bryan Konietzko. The film stars Noah Ringer, Nicola Peltz, Jackson Rathbone and Dev Patel, and was distributed by Paramount Pictures. Released on 2010.07.01 in North America. The film was watched to completion.

Droid Does.

…And so the prophecy says, but what does Droid do?

Diving into the mobile device head first at 100 mph, I uncovered all that Droid can do; take DVD quality video, act as a flashlight, navigate the world (and stars), edit photos, be social, play music, make music, find new music, hear music and tell you who it’s by, surf the web, estimate speed, level surfaces, stop time, calculate things, quiz you, test you, wake your ass up, take shots of things (and scan them for Google searches), control your computer, tune your guitar, search for jobs, news, weather, prices, places tickets, and times;  and…it knows how to cook. But, like most computer systems, they are useless to the everyday user without an interface and programs to suit all the needs of the user.

Enter android market; a place where you can get stuff to make your android phone do things. Here is a top ten selection of some of the coolest apps out there. Badda-bing.

10 > GOOGLE GOGGLES

Take a picture in Google Goggles and watch it come to life. Well, not really, but this app WILL scan your photo and do its best to recognize it and provide you with Google search options based on what it ‘sees’. This is awesome for…well I don’t really know what for, but it’s amazing technology. I tested it out with about a 60% accuracy rate. Truth is that it really depends on the quality of the image you take which depends on the lighting and whatnot. Google Goggles is fairly limited, but it’s great for scanning your favorite items to find reviews or information on them (somewhat)quickly and saving that info. Unfortunately it doesn’t work at all on obscure things like wood, people, liquids or pretty much anything that isn’t labeled up and model shot. I tried to Google myself via Goggles and got a plate of cookies. Pretty close.

09 > SHAZAM

BAM!!! Yeah Shazam. An awesomely simple, yet uber useful app for quickly finding songs to which ya just can’t name. Hear a song you want to know the name, artist and album of; let Shazam hear it too and moments later,…SHAZAM! Now you know the song title, artist, and album. How convenient is that? Shazam is pretty accurate too. There was only one time it didn’t recognize the song I was listening to. Then again it was some really psychedelic jazz from WFUV.

08 > GOOGLE SKY MAP

Talk about romance. Google Sky Map is a romantic date rape. Wow, did I just say that? No really though. If you’re ever out on a hot date with Droid in hand, but the sky is too gloomy or you’ve just got too many clouds in the back of your van, you can rely on Google Sky Map. It’s Google Earth, but for the sky. Simple concept, yet somehow completely and uselessly fun! Even if you’re not on a date, it’s great for the ego because with this redundantly amazing app from Google, YOU are the center of the universe. Sure you can flick and drag your way through the celestial night, but turn on the tilt mode and move your phone around in any-which-way to create your very own observatory. As you tilt or move the phone in any direction, Google Sky Map shows the stars, planets and night sky compliments to where you point. Point down and see the stars the way the other side of the world does. A truly amazing, one-of-a-kind app!

07 > SYNTHESIZER

Bmmm Chikk Bmm Chikk Chikk. Alright, so I can’t type beats, but I can make them with the Synthesizer app. A pretty dope beat maker, Synthesizer gives you a couple different options. It has a touch synthesizer with three octaves of C-A#. Touch the key and hear a sound which is customizable by an array of options including wave form, filter cutoff, attack length, tuning, echo strength and much more. After that you can jump into the sequencer which allows for instrument loading and customization, speed alteration, and scale variations and length. Not only that, but after you’ve mastered a fresh new sequence to freestyle to, tilt the phone and listen as the sequence warps in each direction. For a little app, it packs a big punch that just could keep you musically amused for hours.

06 > PICSAY

Picsay what? Sorry Adobe, but your photoshop ain’t got $h!t on this app. Picsay blows Mobile Photoshop out of the water with their free app which allows you to customize tint, temperature, pixelation, distortion, size, contrast, exposure, saturation, color, brightness and more. This app also allows you to add titling, mustaches, hair, eyes, and noses along with multiple other features that really set Picsay in the lead for best mobile editing app. That’s all in the free version too, just imagine what you get when you pay!

05 > PANDORA

All hail Pandora! Pandora! Pandora! I love Pandora and I just want to take this opportunity to say ‘Thank You’. Thank you for finding music that I’ve never heard and only asking me to tell you one song I like. Thank you for expanding my mind and my ears to the sounds of Blue Sky Black Death, Jedi Mind Tricks, Wax Tailor, and so many many more artists that fill my iPod and heart today. This app only makes me adore you more Pandora. WARNING: IF YOU HAVE NO CLUE WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT OR WHAT PANDORA IS OR HOW TO SPELL PANDORA; YOU NEED TO JUMP ON THE PANDORA TRAIN IMMEDIATELY.

04 > MUSICAL PRO

If you haven’t noticed yet, there’s something of a music theme going on here. Yes, I love my music and I also love making music. Musical Pro lets you do this in a multi-touch kinda way. This is the only app on this list that I paid for, but is well worth it. The free version includes limited features, but the paid version, well….let’s just say it’s not very limited. This app lets you keep a metronome while you play piano at the same time. It will act as a tuner. It will act as a pitch pipe. If you get tired of the one tier piano you can switch to the two tier keyboard and choose one of the 128 instrument presets. Oh yeah, you can even download a song to help you learn it with light up keys!! Or, you can jam out on the drums with four touch pads. What’s really cool is the multi-touch feature so you can do double drum hits or play much more complex piano pieces. Musical Pro can even act as a MIDI over your Wi-Fi network. For two bucks it’s totally worth it and I plan to make it worth it by producing a couple tracks using only my phone. Mwuahaha.

03 > SNESOID LITE

I won’t waste much time talking about the absolute awesomeness of this app. Super Mario 1, 2, & 3, Donkey Kong, Street Fighter Turbo, Earthworm Jim, Uniracers, Contra, Yoshi’s Island, Zelda. The list goes on and on, but you’re right. Super Nintendo Rules!!!! Especially on a portable phone. I always wanted a hand-held Super NES; thanks mom!

02 > GMOTE

G G G Geeeeeeee. Gmote is here….and your computer is there. Don’t wanna get up? Not a problem. Gmote is here. Gmote is a geek’s fantasy. Control your computer from your phone. Only catch is you have to be on the same Wi-Fi network and install the Gmote server on your computer. Still, not a problem. It only takes a minute to set up, but lasts a batteries’ lifetime to play music on your computer from your phone or Google something on your phone and open it up on your computer. The coolest thing about Gmote isn’t just the file system search and execution you can do; it’s the mouse and keyboard function. Yup, you can use the touch screen as a mouse and keyboard for your desktop or laptop computing system. Or, if you have a Moto Droid you can flip the screen up, use that as a mouse while you type on the keypad for simultaneous functionality. So just touch and type and watch your friends freak out as they experience your computer become possessed. It’s so so really cool. Thank you Gmote (but you’re still my numero dos).

01 > ETHEREAL DIALPAD

Along with the them, my number one is obviously a music lover’s delight. Ethereal Dialpad? Sounds like a phone on acid. Sorta, but not really. Ethereal Dialpad is hard to describe but it is a way to make music like no other. Simply drag your finger around one of four dialpads and listen as two strings are simultaneously played according to the interecting points of your finger and movement. You can customize various features regarding the sound of the strings including softness, timber, depth, flanger, octave, and pitch. It really is quite beautiful and amazing. The way it works is simple. Select your pitch and octaves. Depending on this input results in a number of strings vertically and horizontally. As your finger touches any intersecting point Ethereal plays that corresponding sound of the two strings that cross at that point. Slide your finger to the left or right and it holds one string while scaling the vertical strings. Up and down holds vertical string while scaling horizontals. Move it all around and you can scale Mount Everest. Combining the Dialpad app with Musical Pro and the Synthesizer, one can only imagine the tunes, beats, and head-bumpin magic that will be blasting from local speakers ’round the world. Coming soon to a wavelength near you.

..and just in case my words didn’t explain the functionality of this app quite well check this out:

I’m in love with Wired. Simply put. They turn me on to everything I need to know in the tech world. Here is a perfect example: Constructing A Song. Sounds like an interesting article, and… it is. The article is a basic summary of the process which ‘How to Destroy Angels’ goes through in making one of their melodic tracks. Further investigation reveals that this awesome group of musicians (including of NIN frontman Trent Reznor & producer Atticus Ross) has a new album out. Oh, and check this out, it’s FREE! Word up, so get that ish: HERE

So far so good. The style is very interesting; something of a mixture of deep drum beats, jungle, smoothly presented vocals and a little techie discord. If you like Massive Attack, Cocteau Twins, or any variation of those transient electronic genres, you have to check this album out. What’s to lose, cuz….it’s free. Sounds pretty sweet to me.

Oh dear Lord what is wrong with me? Seriously, there are the things going through my clearly deranged and misguided head like “oh my my isn’t Tom Cruise charming?” WTF? I keep seeing him in that denim shirt with that hair shaking in front of his eyes and I am MAGICALLY transported to my mom’s game room, I’m 15. I’m sewing extremely 90′s purses made of red velvet for my friends. I’m watching Top Gun on TV and I’m thinking to myself… I can’t wait to grow up and go to bars and meet handsome men!! (yay for me, that happened, who said I didn’t have ambition to see my goals through?) Handsome men with microphones and complicated childhoods and… OH MY GOD I JUST SWOONED ON THE INSIDE THINKING OF TOM CRUISE IN “THE FIRM.” I might need to be institutionalized. I wonder if my health insurance covers that…

I went to Rotten Tomatoes to try to get this feeling to go away (to lose this loving feeling if you will), it’s at 53%. That’s not too bad, and even the bad reviews are like “oh it’s silly and they have no chemistry.” Well duh they have no chemistry, but I’m totally willing to believe that they hung out every night talking about magic and rainbows and giggling a lot. Take this green splat review from Dana Stevens at Slate:

Cruise, for his part, can still dependably produce unlimited quantities of Tom Cruise-ness, a natural resource undiminished and virtually unchanged since its discovery in 1983.

See? That’s not that bad!

Right now I’m totally ignoring so many factors:
- He’s crazy
- His marriage if not fake, is at the least creepy
- He lets his daughter wear high heels
- The Les Grossman thing
- The Oprah thing
- The crazy thing

I CAN’T EVEN REMEMBER THE CLEARLY EXTENSIVE LIST OF REASONS NOT TO LIKE TOM CRUISE.

I’m back in! I’m back on the band wagon, I’m back in the saddle!

Also I’m terrified of flying IRL, and it’s not even bothering me that there’s a plane crash in this trailer! My instincts are saying, oh Tom’s there, everything is FINE.

(Also I should mention that I’m having an emotional crisis because I’m the same age as Diaz when she was in the Sweetest Thing. She was a successful advertising agent, she had a really nice couch and she was totally ready to get married! Opposite of my life! Even now though, I can’t remember not liking her… Tom Cruise is MAKING me like Cameron Diaz with his bangs! HOW!?!)

Mother of crap I’m going to love this.

Preferences: we all have them. Whether you like Coca-Cola over Pepsi, subtitled anime over dubbed, or dogs over cats. As gamers, some prefer to play shooters with a controller, while others prefer to use a keyboard and mouse. However you can’t use a keyboard and mouse (to play games) on a console… Or can you? The XCM XFPS Rateup Adapter for PS3 aims to change that. Still, the question remains: Does it hit its mark, or does it shoot itself in the foot?

Better known as XCM, Farmer has been in the business for roughly 10 years, making such products as converters, peripherals and cases. Their first popular and arguably their best-known product is the Xtender Case Mod for the original XBox. Most people now refer to their products as XCM (short for “Xtender Case Mod”) and not Farmer. So, they’ve went by the letters XCM ever since. I discovered the XCM XFPS Rateup Adapter for PS3 (Rateup) while trying to figure out some way to play games that have more complex control schemes, such as Demon’s Souls and Batman: Arkham Asylum.

When you get the Rateup, you get the adapter itself and the instruction manual. While I’ve seen some people say the manual leaves things to be desired, I find it to be clear and straight to the point. It explains the adapter in diagrams and how to set it up.

The Rateup boasts the ability to map any part of the controller to any key of the keyboard and mouse, including both analog sticks and the buttons underneath them (L3 and R3). It has 2 USB ports, 2 PS/2 ports and one PlayStation/PlayStation 2 port, so the keyboard and/or mouse you use can be USB or PS/2. The Rateup comes with a preset/default mapping for the keyboard and mouse, but you can also customize the mapping to your liking.

To set your keyboard up how you want it after you’ve plugged it in to the Rateup made sure it’s set to port 1 (by pressing F1 on the keyboard), reset your PS3 controller and plugging that in is: You press the “P” (program) button, press what button on the controller you’d wish to assign, and push the desired button on the keyboard or mouse. It saves your mappings to the adapter itself, but certain things are not saved, such as your right analog settings. You can use a PlayStation 2 controller, but unlike the keyboard/mouse, you can’t remap the buttons.

The Rateup also has built-in Turbo/Rapid-Fire — 8 instances, actually. One for each action button. This is very useful in action games like Dante’s Inferno, or God of War. In addition, it lets you adjust the sensitivity of your mouse with 2 dials, one for the X axis and one for the Y. XCM also says that the Rateup is compatible with 95% of different kinds of mice and keyboards, not every one.

While it says it is compatible with all PS3 games, I haven’t had a chance to try the Rateup on games that use motion controls so I cannot say whether or not it works with those games. However, XCM has made a similar product that they say “supports Playstation 3 Sixaxis [motion control] games.”

As a physically challenged gamer, some games are difficult for me to play, even using BenHeck’s Access Controller. While I don’t play First or Third-Person Shooters (“FPS” or ‘Shooter” respectively) like Call of Duty, I’ve tried the Rateup with my wired HP keyboard, playing several titles, including Trine, Batman: Arkham Asylum, and Soul Calibur 4. Although I had to re-program the Rateup for each game (because I play one-handed), it was a tremendous help in Trine and Batman: Arkham Asylum. I am now able to play more efficiently, having the ability to remap the control to the keyboard, giving me full access to it.

In Trine and Batman: Arkham Asylum, I can pull off moves that require the shoulder buttons to be pressed, without having to contort my hand to press 3 things all at once. For example, I can do the Wizard’s magic in Trine, and stealth takedowns in Batman. The fact that you have to press 3 things at once was the only thing that stopped me from actually putting time into those titles. However now that I can have full access now, I don’t foresee anything stopping me, unless there are hidden motion controls that I am aware of. Soul Calibur 4, however, I’m having getting used to, mostly because I’ve spent years and years playing fighting games on a controller, not a keyboard. I can do it but I have a little trouble.

There are a few drawbacks with the Rateup, including the fact that not every part of your mapping is saved and the somewhat redundant setup, but none of them are deal-breakers. I can’t say whether or not it works well for Shooters, but as an adapter that lets you use your keyboard as a controller, the Rateup works wonderful.

The XCM XFPS Rateup Adapter for PS3 retails for $98.99 USD on Extreme Mods. It may seem pricey, but we gamers spend around $150 on an arcade stick, so it’s rather cheap.

Extreme Mods is a website that sells console modification products and accessories, such as cases and cables. They have been featured by such media sources as Game Informer, GamePro, and X-Play. In addition, they are an official North American reseller of XCM/Farmer products. They sent us the XCM XFPS Rateup Adapter for PS3 for review and I’d like to thank them for doing so.

So what exactly do Pioneer Restaurant, the local Verizon Wireless, and DT Hardware have in common?

Really not much other than that they share the west 231st block with a new player in town. Not so much a player; more like a melter. Chocolate melter that is. Welcome Leila’s Hand Dipped Chocolates; the best treat to enter the Bronx since hip-hop.

Passing by the plethora of shops surrounding the paved canals and bustle of rubber against cracked cement I, or I should say, my nostril senses began to tingle. They detected the likes of a sweet, comforting, yet almost arousing scent that brought back memories of being ‘lost’ in Hershey Park. The aroma entered through my nose and kissed my brain as I struggled to find it’s origin. Luckily my struggle was quickly relieved as was I, to see Leila’s; a quaint little chocolate shop sitting there so innocently next to the local Verizon wireless store.

I hesitated not to enter and was dumbfounded by the uniqueness of a chocolatier here in the Boogie down, not to mention the wide smile encompassing my face. Ahhh, who doesn’t love the sweet smell of cocoa and coffee? Bliss in dozens of flavors, shapes and sizes. Vividly lit to see each and every articulately melted and molded treat, Leila’s invites and soothes. If the quietly peaceful environment doesn’t lull you in, their eye candy will consume you first. Only open since April, Leila’s offers a wide selection of sweets, sugar free treats, kosher pleasantries, ice cream, gelato and coffee. But don’t dare call these splendors candy! Everything on the menu is of the purest quality chocolate, not only melting in your mouth, but allowing your body to flow with it.

The owner was kind enough to allow me to interview him AND sample several of his products. Check out the interview below then be sure to see the Top Ten Treats!

Leila’s Hand Dipped Chocolate

225 w231st.

Bronx, NY 10463

Keith Mitchell: Owner

Accountant, Photographer, Screenwriter, Chocolatier

What inspired you to open up your own chocolate shop?

I worked in a chocolate store many years ago, like in the 90’s, called Evelyn’s Chocolates. I just really liked the atmosphere. I liked the customer friendliness of the place. It just seemed like people were happy when they came to buy chocolate. I thought that’s the kind of thing I want to do, you know, be able to talk to people, be able to meet those, but have good conversation and atmosphere.

How does one go about opening up a chocolate shop?

I actually got laid off in December, from my job, I’m an accountant. Before starting to look for work, I said, let me just see if I’m able to do something on my own; see if I have enough resources. I started looking for stores, you know, and I found this location. The rent was high but we negotiated a better price. They were able to come down to a price that I could afford. Everything just seemed like it fell into place. I got my friend who still owns the other chocolate store. He came in and looked at the setup and explained to me the best way to do it. He actually supplied me with a lot of my chocolate to start me up. He still supplies a lot of my chocolate actually. He makes chocolate in the store where I make a very small amount. I don’t make as much as he does because I don’t have those kinds of resources.  I don’t make all of my chocolate; yet. I started scouting out equipment, getting what I needed to get. Figure out the best way to do in a way that doesn’t kill me financially, but I’m able to slowly recoop the investment.

How did you choose this location?

There were only two locations I was willing to do this in and this was one of them. The other was on Jerome Ave. near Montefiore, just because the commercial traffic is enough and there’s just enough traffic to support this kind of business if the product is good. Most other places for this kind of business you need to have just a lot of people walking by. The chocolate store in Manhattan, Evelyn’s, does really well just because there are a lot of people walking by.

Have you used any specific marketing tactics?

Specific tactics? No. I just keep trying stuff; whatever works. I do more, whatever doesn’t work I toss. I’m planning to do more with marketing now that I have this Gelato freezer and just sort of trying to find a way to market myself as an all around shop for all the treats you would imagine. Not low-end, not like a candy store. Like a nice dessert-chocolatier shop.

Do you have a website?

Not yet, but I have the domain. I try to do too much on my own. I don’t like to just give people stuff to do; not that I’m a control freak, I just like take things into my own hands. I’ve been planning on doing the website myself I just haven’t gotten the chance to yet.

What process does the chocolate go through?

We have a machine that melts the chocolate. It’s simple. You just throw big blocks of chocolate into the machine and it melts it down and then you have molds. You either mold it into different things or you can add nuts or fruit. Most of the things that I do are nuts or simple things like strawberries. I use a small amount of molds, but eventually my goal is to do everything here. I just think I’m over-tasking myself. I’m trying to do the gelato myself too.

What about the clusters?

The clusters are not molds. You pretty much just put the nuts on a tray and mess around with it with your hands to form it. The chocolate cool; as it cools it takes a shape and you can change that shape with your hand. Once you get the hang of it it’s simple. It’s a little difficult to get the hang of, to produce something that looks presentable to eat, but like I said, once you get the hang of it it’s simple. The one thing we don’t make here, which is probably our biggest seller, are these little cakes.

So what are your major goals from here on out?

We have ice cream, we’ll have frozen yogurt soon. Most importantly I want my shop to be Kosher certified and I’m going to need a Rabbi to come in soon for that. I would also like to have all my chocolates made in store and prove that my ice cream is better than Baskin Robbins. I buy only from local shops to show my support for local small business. Eventually I want to expand my coffee business and establish my shop as a fine place to get a great cup of coffee and some amazing desserts; kind of like a European-esque dessert shop. My major goal is to leave something for my daughter. It’s called Leila’s, that’s my daughter. For me, I struggled as a kid. I grew up in the projects, south Bronx. I was homeless for many years of my life so I can’t imagine seeing my daughter go through those things. This is sort of like leaving her some way to get through school, so she doesn’t have to worry about tuition and…the things that I had to worry about. I’m not looking to make a million dollars; I’m just trying to build a sustainable business model.

And so you all know what to get (as if you could choose) when you come to Leila’s, Keith has provided us with the Top Ten Treats!

1. RED VELVET CAKE with WHITE CHOCOLATE
2. HAZELNUT TRUFFLE
3. RAINBOW COOKIE
4. RED VELVET CAKE with DARK CHOCOLATE
5. COOKIES and CREAM ICE CREAM
6. DARK CHOCOLATE and GRANOLA CLUSTER
7. CHOCOLATE CHARACTER LOLLIPOPS
8. CARROT CAKE with WHITE CHOCOLATE
9. ALMOND BUTTER CRUNCH
10. TRIPLE CHOCOLATE CAKE

Leila’s is definitely a sweet place to go during any time of the year, for awesome holiday gifts or just to kick it and endeavor upon a tantalizing journey through your sense. I’ve been lucky enough to sample some of these treats and I definitely agree with number 1. The Red Velvet Cake with white chocolate is absolute bliss. Slightly chilled it has the texture of the softest cheesecake and will easily soak your buds with temptation for more. The rainbow cookies are like no other, yet remain very reasonably priced. Aside from these favorites I also got to sample the un-melted, pure chocolate. Holy shit! Out of this world. The chocolate melts in your mouth so effortlessly, allowing your entire body to follow with ease. The dark chocolate is rich and smooth enough to make Bond look jagged. These aromatic doors are open for all to enjoy and I think Leila’s has brought a good thing to the neighborhood, giving locals a good reason to smile and let their taste buds loose.

Leila’s Hand Dipped Chocolates

225 w231st Street Bronx, NY 10463

Many thanks to Keith at Leila’s for the interview and amazing samples of chocolates. Good luck and great success chocolatier!

Felicia Day’s award-winning webseries, The Guild returns for a third season. The series tells the story of a local guild and their adventures both in and outside of the game. Following the troubling conclusion of season 2, tempers flare and a rival guild shows up. Things escalate when the rival guild starts terrorizing the Knights of Good in-game and out. Will the Knights of Good survive the trials and tribulations, or will anarchy reign supreme?

While I first heard of The Guild at SXSW 2008, I didn’t start watching it until after I saw Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog, which made me a fan of Felicia Day. I had been playing World of Warcraft for a while, so the subject matter was something I could relate to. However, the show is written so well that I became a fan almost immediately, not because I also play an MMO, but because it’s a good series. As Peter’s previously said, “watching a season all together is a lot more like watching a movie than a web series.”

Each episode in the series runs anywhere from 3 to 10 minutes in duration, the ending of each making you yearn for the next episode. Luckily you don’t have to wait a week for each episode, as all 12 episodes of season 3 are contained on the DVD. Each season of The Guild is filled with drama, humor and a plot twist here and there, much like any other series, on-air or online.

Season 3 marks the appearance of several new faces to The Guild, including Wil Wheaton as the leader of the rival Axis of Anarchy. This was my first time seeing him in a role other than Wesley Crusher, and I have to say he pulled off the antagonist role very nicely. In fact, the entire Axis of Anarchy cast pulled off their roles great. My favorite would have to be Venom, played by Teal Sherer. Venom is wheelchair-bound and tired of the sympathy everyone gives her (and frankly, so am I), and has no problem exploiting her wheelchair when it suits her.

The DVD also contains several hilarious gag reels; the “(Do You Wanna Date My) Avatar” music video and a behind-the-scenes short; interviews with the Axis of Anarchy, which are a good look at the characters and their actors; a featurette on how to make Vork’s sword; the Guild Halloween video, which I hadn’t seen until I watched the DVD; video applications of people who wanted to become a part of the Knights of Good; advice for people who want to make a web video; and a PDF file of the script.

You can watch The Guild episodes, as well as order merchandise at the series website: http://www.watchtheguild.com/. The Season 3 DVD is out now from New Video. You can order it from The Guild‘s website. Felicia also warns you that the DVD is uncensored.

New Video is a leading independent Blu-ray, DVD and digital distributor specializing in multiple genres, including cutting-edge documentaries, independent films, cult hits (such as Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog), and classic kids programming. They also provide over 11,000 hours of film and television programming from more than 120 trusted brands to download and streaming platforms including iTunes, Hulu, YouTube, Netflix, Xbox, Sony Playstation and Amazon. They gave me this DVD for review, and I would like to thank them for doing so.

Within the last decade or so, whether it is due to slimlining or just new chipsets, video game systems have had many reincarnations, the latest most notably being Nintendo’s DSi XL. However, last October, Sony released a new incarnation of its PSP, named the PSPgo, commonly referred to as just the Go (its model number is PSP-N1000, as opposed to other models PSP-1000, PSP-2000, and PSP-3000). But the question remains: Is the device good to go, or should we take a detour around it? This is a topic that has been pretty iffy, as some don’t like it and others do.

Revealed on 2009.05.30 and retailing at a whopping $249.99 USD new, the PSPgo is Sony’s latest reincarnation of its PlayStation Portable system, and the first to be exclusively digital. What does this mean? It means that unlike previous models in the PSP line which use Universal Media Discs (UMDs), the Go does not support any physical media. Instead, it come standard with 16GB of internal memory, which can be extended up to 32GB by putting in a Memory Stick Micro flash card.

In order to play games, you have to buy and download them from the PlayStation Store (PS Store). This is both a good and bad thing; it’s good because you don’t have to carry discs around with you. However, it’s bad, because if you do have games on UMD, you can’t play them; you’d have to re-buy them the from the PS Store and download them. There is unfortunately no way to redeem your UMDs for digital copies. In addition, not every previously released game in the PSP library is up on the PS Store. However, Sony has stated that all future games will be.

Like its elder brethren, the Go features 802.11b Wi-Fi. Not necessarily the best, but it gets the job done and in decent time. The Go is also 43% lighter and 56% smaller than the original PSP (1000), and 16% lighter and 35% smaller than the PSP-3000. That’s one heck of a size reduction! Its screen is a 3.8-inch 480×272 LCD, as opposed to previous models’ larger 4.3-inch 480×272 LCD. Some people don’t like the fact that the screen is smaller, but I honestly don’t mind it.

The screen slides up to reveal the main controls, which are closer together than they are on previous models. The distance between the directional pad (D-Pad) and face buttons on the Go is only approximately 3.75 inches, as opposed to approximately 6.25 inches on a PSP-1000, and approximately 6 inches on a PSP-2000. Like with previous incarnations, the D-Pad, analog nub, start and select, Home, and face buttons are on the front. The Home button, however, now looks like the Home button on a PlayStation 3 controller and is on the panel with the screen. Volume and screen brightness control are now on the top, along with the left and right shoulder buttons.

The face buttons themselves are just a little clicky, but this is a good thing rather than a bad thing. Unlike some third-party console controllers that I’ve tried which had horrendously clicky buttons, the Go’s clicky buttons are only noticeable when you press the button down all the way, and even then the click is barely noticeable. The analog nub is still as terrible as it is on previous models. With the volume and screen brightness control buttons being in the middle on the top of the system, they are very difficult to use while the screen is slid up.

Also, much like its predecessors’, the Go’s battery, which is rechargeable also offers about the same life — 3-6 hours per charge depending on what you do. The difference between the Go’s battery and other models’ is that the Go’s isn’t replaceable by an user. It is thought that it was made as such to thwart piracy.

The battery isn’t the only thing Sony changed for the Go. They also combined the AC power cord/charger, and the data transfer cord into one. No longer does it use a standard USB A-to-Mini-B cable which is common to many devices, including several phones such as my T-Mobile Sidekick. Instead, the Go comes with a new multi-use cable, which resembles an iPod cable.

The Go also boasts Bluetooth connectivity, enabling the use of compatible Bluetooth headsets as well as tethering with Bluetooth-enabled mobile phones (I’ve yet to try it with my Sidekick). It also enables users to sync and play games with a PlayStation 3 (PS3) controller. The latter was the main draw about the Go for me. As I’m a physically challenged gamer, I couldn’t play my PSP when I was out, because of the distance between the D-Pad and face buttons. With the Go, however, I can sync a PS3 controller to it then be on my way to play. This makes the Go a truly portable system for me, as I can now play PSP games, whenever and wherever I want; something I can’t do with previous models.

If you don’t have Wi-Fi, you can also use a Windows program called Media Go. This program lets you access the PS Store, download and install games and software to a connected PSP, as well as other compatible devices. The software can also be used to manage and transfer other media such as music, videos and photos stored on the PSP and other compatible devices. Files are transferred to the PSP or other device via a USB connection (Think iTunes, but for Sony devices).

The PSPgo has a few drawbacks, the most notable being its hefty pricetag and lack of UMD support, but if you’re a physically challenged gamer and/or never had a PSP before, I would highly recommend you get a PSPgo. Not having discs and being able to used a PS3 controller is so wonderful, as is playing while traveling. One bit of advice though: try to get a used Go, as those retail for $149.99 USD — $100 cheaper than a new one. That’s what I did; I finally traded in my XBox 360, and used that money to purchase a used PSPgo, the beginning of this month. Two of the best decisions I’ve made in regards to gaming, I say. However, if you already have or have had a PSP and have a lot of UMDs, you might want to stay away from the Go, because you’ll have to re-buy all of your games… Well, the ones that are on the PS Store, at least.

In Swingers, Mikey (played by Jon the Fav) talks about how the coolest bars in L.A. are the ones nobody can find.  And saying you’ve been to one is like bragging that you know how to find it.   Thursday midnight/Friday morning screenings in New York City are kind of the same thing.  They’re exclusive (limited seating).  You can’t just waltz in at the last minute and expect to be a priority.  And…

There are rules.  And the crowds are super excited and most likely overdosing on sugar and adrenaline.  And once those doors open, you better MOVE.  But if you’ve done it once and survived, you know the deal.  And knowing the deal totally entitles you to bitch about people who do it WRONG (no, you can’t save 7825739 seats with one jacket… a**hole).  And while I totally dread the panicked stampede into the theatre that ensues in the search for prime seating, a part of me celebrates the ritual, which I endure with a strange sort of pride.  Because a night at the movies in New York City is different.   And midnight shows are packed with people who are all part of the same crazy/nerdy/awesome club.

Last night, that club was dubbed (mostly, by me) Iron Man 2 Is Out And We Are FREAKING THE F*** OUT!

There are a number of factors involved here.

1)   It’s been a rough year so far for movies and people are seriously starved.

2)   It’s SUMMER!  It’s the one time of year when audiences are totally permitted to be as demonically demanding of Hollywood as humanly possible.  “You spent how much to make that piece of shit???  Gimme my money back, you thieving a**holes!”

3)   Explosions, explosions, explosions.

But the fuel behind Iron Man (and the robust midnight-screening returns of its sequel) is most apparent in the time between its decent but comparably less exciting action sequences.  What drives this franchise… is the Funny… steered by the impeccable timing and lightning-quick wit of the incomparable Mr. Robert Downey, Jr.

Arguably one of the most engaging and watchable screen actors of his generation, Downey is the master of comedic muttering.  And it flows out of him like music.  Conditions that would undoubtedly throw off a lesser actor, only serve to magnify the nuances of all the hilarity he throws at you.  Whether he’s juggling various threads of dialogue in a single scene, complicated physical work or maneuvering imaginary computer images, he’s never lost.  It’s this virtuosity that completely endears us and we’re only occasionally leaning forward in our seats when he’s actually suited up as Iron Man.  What we really want… are the words.  Ohmygod, what is he going to say next?  I can’t STAND how funny he is!!!

It’s rare that there is such a need to single out the acting in a project like this.  But the Fav— ahem.  Sorry.  Mr. Favreau wisely positioned Downey and his acting chops as the centerpiece of the first film, and he’s smart enough to know that it totally works.  We also see shades of this from Christian Bale’s Fake Bruce Wayne, in The Dark Knight, which serves as a disguise not just for Batman, but Real Bruce Wayne.  It’s an enjoyable character dimension (largely because Fake Bruce is kind of a dick) that’s all about personality.

But Tony isn’t a ruse.  Tony Stark isn’t pretending to be Tony Stark, while he’s actually Iron Man.  And removing the constraints of the conventional secret-identity set-up only opens the door for riotous truth-telling from our protagonist.  All that narcissistic immaturity is completely for real.  And when is that never a fun ride?  Especially with Downey at the wheel.  I mean, if you have him, you gotta let him play, you know?

Oh.  And also, give him cool people to act against.  Mickey Rourke, yes.  Sam Rockwell, yes.  Don “The Chead” Cheadle, yes!  ScarJo (Someone else called her that, promise), yes.  And while there are some polarized opinions about Mrs. Paltrow, she’s pretty saucy against Downey.  And the two of them together pull off an impressive revival of the romantic-screwball comedy.  The real kind… the kind that doesn’t make my brain vomit.

Is Iron Man 2 awesome, like The Dark Knight-awesome??  No (to be fair, what is?).   But I don’t care.  This movie is definitely a re-watchable laugh-fest that gives us Downey in top form.  Go!  Now!  Right now!  And once you see it, you’ll be a full-fledged member of the Cool People Like Iron Man 2 Club.

Fictional secret agents, such as the iconic James Bond, have had cool gadgets like pen-bombs, laser-shooting wristwatches, and grappling hook belts. Now technology has gotten to a point where normal people (like you and I) can have such gadgets. ThinkGeek (a shopping site for geeks) has come out with Spy Camera Sunglasses, but are they suitable for their intended mission, or should they be terminated?

I became interested in these glasses last year after attending Anime North. As I am physically challenged, I’m unable to work a regular camera; I can’t even use the camera on my phone. Frustrated by the fact that I couldn’t take pictures of the beautiful costumes myself (my mother was there with her camera, but still), I began searching to see if there was some solution to my problem. I was later emailed by my friend, informing me about the glasses. They looked like a viable solution.

When you get the glasses, which supposedly come in your choice of up to 4GB of storage, you also get a remote with a strap, a mini USB cable, a storage case, a cleaning cloth, extra clear lenses, the manual, and a driver CD for Windows 98 users. The only thing they don’t come with is an AC adapter, which is a disappointment. It’s an optional accessory.

The case opens like a book, and it stores everything except the CD and the manual, and is pretty sturdy for plastic. My only problem with it is, the night I got the glasses, the hinge of the case popped out. It was easy to fix (I just had to snap it back in), but the hinge could have been better made.

The glasses themselves are quite lightweight, though a bit heavier than ordinary glasses. They’re made of plastic, and while I haven’t done a thorough durability test, they do seem to be durable. Having put them on myself (read: one-handed) a few times, and dropping them once, they still work and haven’t broken. The lens-frame and temple arms are one piece, while the earpieces fold. The lens flip up, and the sunglasses lens, at least are UV400 which is said to protect your eyes from 99-100% of UV rays.

In addition to having built-in cameras, the glasses also have built-in MP3 playback with built-in earbuds. The earbuds, which are corded, are connected to the bottom of the temple arms, and can be hooked to the earpieces of the glasses when not in use, thanks to a thin yet sturdy piece of plastic on the earpieces. The sound quality from the earbuds is on par with your average buds. They leave something to be desired by audiophiles, but for the average music listener, they do just fine.

The temple arms are a bit bulky, but this is because the 2 cameras, and the battery and MP3 player are housed in them. On the top of the arms, there are buttons; the power button (which you need to hold to turn the glasses on or off), which oddly plays or pauses the current MP3, is on the left, while the right has 2 buttons: one to capture images/raise the volume in the earbuds/skip to the next MP3, and one to lower the volume/skip to the previous MP3. The only problem I have is that the blue light that tells you the glasses are on, is in a spot where you can’t see it, at least not in lit places.

The remote is a little bigger than the Eisenhower/original silver dollar (or for you PokeMon fans, it’s about the size of the PokeWalker), and it has 2 buttons: one in the middle to capture images, and one near the strap to play/skip MP3s.

The cameras are 1.3 megapixels each and they capture images at a resolution of 1280×1024. To capture an image, you have to press the button and wait for 3 beeps, the last beep signals that the image has been captured. The pictures look better than what I was originally expecting (given my webcam), but they still look a bit over-saturated. The low pixel count is a bit of let-down, given that even camera phones take higher quality pictures (Tanya‘s is 5 megapixels), but it’s not that much of a drawback.

The battery is polymer li-ion and rechargeable. The battery life varies, depending on how many pictures you take per minute. If you keep taking 10 pictures a minute, the battery will only last 2 hours, but if you only take 1 picture a minute, it will last 9 hours. The mini USB cord, which is USB 2.0, does double-duty. It is used for data transfer as well as re-charging the battery.

In addition to my above complaints, I also have a problem with the location of the mini USB port on the glasses. It’s located on the bottom of the left temple arm, next to the earbud cord. It’s covered by a flexible piece of… either silicon or rubber, and it’s so close to the earbud cord that you have to hold the cover open and move the cord out of the way just to plug the mini USB in. I can do it myself, but it’s a bit of a hassle.

Even with their shortcomings, the 1.3 Megapixel Spy Camera Sunglasses, which retail for $69.99 on ThinkGeek, are a wonderful product, one that I’d recommend not only for other challenged individuals, but for anyone that doesn’t care if the pictures are crystal clear and don’t feel like carrying an actual camera. The sense of freedom and the new ability these glasses have given me make them worth the price. My only suggestions are, if a new model of these glasses were to be made, bumping the pixel count up to at least 5 megapixels, moving the light so it can be seen, and include an adapter.

ThinkGeek specializes in geek products, such as mini USB monitors, roll-up keyboards, and humping-dog USB flash drives. In addition, they have a “Security & Spy Stuff” section that has stuff like video-watches and hidden flash drives. They even carry t-shirts and edible stuff like wasabi gumballs(?! o.o) and energy drinks. They gave me this product for review, and I would like to thank them for doing so.

For every action, there is a reaction. Whether we go to work and get paid, or don’t study and fail an exam, everything we do has an impact on the future. This is one of the first lessons we learn in life, and it’s the main theme of French developer Quantic Dream’s latest title, Heavy Rain.

Quantic Dream has released 2 other titles in the past (1999′s Omikron: The Nomad Soul, and 2005′s Fahrenheit, released in North America under the title Indigo Prophecy), but Heavy Rain is the developer’s most ambitious project to date. The question is though, does it sing in the rain, or flow into the sewers?

The story at its core is one of love and what you would do to save a loved one. For some time, someone has been kidnapping young boys who are later found drowned in rain water, with an orchid on their chest and origami in their hand. This causes the culprit to be called The Origami Killer. The main characters are in search of the killer for their own reasons. As with any game, expect plot twists and surprises. The story’s strong the entire game, and it does a great job of tying up loose ends.

The story is split between 4 playable characters, all of whom you get to control, one per chapter. However, it is not like an RPG, wherein you have a group, or “party.” The 4 playable characters in Heavy Rain are separate for most of the game, and yet in some way are connected (think six degrees of separation). These 4 are: Ethan Mars, an once-prosperous architect whose son is abducted; Madison Paige, a photo journalist covering the Origami Killer story; Norman Jayden, a FBI agent working on the Origami Killer case; and Scott Shelby, a private investigator asked by the victimized families of the Origami Killer to find the culprit and bring him to justice.

Every aspect of Heavy Rain is top-notch, from the music and voice-acting, to the graphics and animation. In my opinion, they are on par with Hollywood movies.

The music, which was recorded in London’s Abbey Road Studios, was composed and conducted by Normand Corbeil (Ashley Judd & Tommy Lee Jones’ 1999 film, Double Jeopardy). Every single track invokes a strong sense of a specific feeling — sadness, suspense, even happiness. The music is just one thing that makes the game leave such an impact on the person playing.

The voice-acting is phenomenal. Heavy Rain‘s voice cast is one of the best I’ve heard in any media, and that’s saying something, as I’ve heard a LOT of voice casts in my time. All of the characters are incredibly well-rounded and life-like. This stems from the fact that a lot of people auditioned to be in this title, 457 to be exact. Of those 457, only 90 were selected. So that’s 90 characters with at least one line of dialogue. In regards to acting, out of the 4 main characters, my favorite is Norman Jayden. Leon Ockenden, the actor who voices Jayden, lays everything out there. You can just feel the emotion radiating from his acting.

I’ll say it right now. I think the graphics and animation are a cut above other games, including Final Fantasy titles, which are renowned for looking gorgeous. This is because most, if not all, of the game was motion-captured (mocapped), including movement and the dialogue. The shooting took 172 days and within that time, they recorded 30,000 unique animations. That’s a lot of mocapping.

The graphics are so life-like, and yet there’s still that tiny bit that keeps them looking CG. Faces in particular look very realistic, because Quantic Dream made virtual actors (the real actors had their heads scanned to create digital computer models thereof). The textures are what you’ve come to expect from 360 and PS3 games, they’re incredibly detailed. Even on my SDTV, I can see a lot of detail.

Heavy Rain itself plays out more like an interactive film, rather than a game. It’s hard to explain why; it just does. In this case, it’s a major plus. It pushes the limits of story-telling from most other games.

One of the main things that sets Heavy Rain apart from other titles is its choice mechanic. Almost every situation can be approached in a number of ways, including dialogue. You can choose whether or not to stop a robbery, in addition to the way you stop it. One scenario of this instance is that you can knock the robber out with a bottle of liquor from behind, or you can talk them into just leaving. You can control when or if your character asks a question, and the manner in which they ask it. Almost every one of the choices you make affect the game from that point on, although some events occur no matter what you do. It is also possible for any or all four characters to die, so choose carefully.

Heavy Rain also features a thought system that lets you hear what the character is thinking at almost any given moment by holding a shoulder button. This is an unique and interesting feature that I’ve yet to come across in any other game.

The controls… Whew, boy, there’s so much to be said about them. I’ll start out with these 2 comments: 1) The game does use motion-control, and 2) your difficulty setting determines how prominently it’s used. One example is: During a fight, on Medium, you might have to shake the controller up and down to escape someone’s grasp. However, during that exact same fight on Easy, you just have to mash a button to escape their grasp. The difficulty does not affect all motion prompts though, as some are universal throughout all 3 difficulties.

While not as groundbreaking as the motion controls were at the launch of the Wii, Heavy Rain‘s motion controls are very intuitive. They really shine when doing little things, such as shaking the controller to shake an OJ carton, or moving the controller downward to crush something into a desk. Quantic Dream really put thought into the motions, instead of using random ones.

Movement is controlled by holding R2 to move and using the left analog stick to turn. When not holding R2, holding the left stick controls which way the character is looking. Flicking the left stick in a specific direction while the character is standing, makes the character turn in place and face that direction.

Dialogue is chosen with the face buttons (Triangle, O, X, and Square). Each button is a specific response, which vary depending on the situation.

During action sequences, we’re treated to quick time events (QTEs), where you have to follow the onscreen prompts (ie: when a ‘X’ come up, you press X, when an arrow appears, you push the right stick in that direction).

Interaction with objects is handled by holding a button and/or moving the right stick. These movements can be as generic as pushing the stick up, or they can be as unique as moving it up a quarter-circle.

There are times when you have to hold multiple buttons. These can be as simple as holding X and O, but other times, they’re insane. I call those ones “Controller Twister,” because you have to hold something like R1, L1 and shake the controller, or even Square, L1, Triangle, R1, O and mash X. Those are fun… Not.

As a disabled gamer, there were only 3 times when I needed help, because the prompts were mandatory (I was stuck at R1, L1 and shake the controller, for a couple days, because I had no one to help me).

After 2 less-than-stellar attempts, Quantic Dream has returned with an outstanding game, one that I’m proud to say, made me buy a PS3. Heavy Rain is a game unlike any we’ve played before. The graphics are amazing, the music and acting are on par with Hollywood movies, the story is so powerful and engaging, and the controls are just awesome. Without a doubt, I say Heavy Rain is worthy of a Game of the Year award. I highly recommend it to anyone who has a PS3.

Rating: ***** (5 Stars)

Heavy Rain was developed by Quantic Dream, and published by Sony Computer Entertainment. It retails for $59.99 USD new, and is rated M for mature. In addition, Sony is offering a printable alternative box art.

In the era of remakes and remixes, it seems we all have something to say about original classics which undergo personally artistic make-overs. There tends to be a higher level of expectation for works of art, especially films, that are re-created and molded after their maiden form. This perception also bleeds into the criticism loyal fans disperse upon such valiant efforts, as well as the impressionable ears of our interwoven society. Alice in Wonderland has surely not escaped this grip, although it seems confusion is strangling the films quality and enjoyability for many.

First, let me review this film and provide my unbiased opinion. Yes, I thoroughly enjoyed this movie and found it to be everything a Burton film usually is. It made me smile, laugh, stare and realize yet again why I love Burton’s artistic point of view. Burton’s amazing ability to portray his angst, Calagari-esque style through the art of film and animation has always intrigued and tantalized my oculars. Watching his films brings me to a place where I can live through my pupils; and no, I am not a teacher. I love how he finds beauty in the smallest details, yet a beauty one would rarely classify as so. His dark themes manage to scream life filled with peculiarities in only the maddest of creative ways. The movie itself is very beautiful and somewhat trippy if you will (although I find psychedelia to be within Burton’s nature). His portrayal of Wonderland is one that could only come from the depths of a Timothy mind. Simple fragments such as ravens flying in place to hold up a chandelier, expose the individual flavor Burton brings to every film project he endeavors upon. The artistic value of this film alone is enough for anyone to stand up and applaud. Whether it be ‘just as the original intended or not’, the look and feel of the environments really make this film his own. This is, I presume, what he wanted.

This brings me to the story; one that he has made his own. Most of what I’ve heard about this film from other movie-goers is that of disappointment and a lack of continuity throughout Burton’s rendition. Unfortunately, the biased minds of many have taken the title and assumed it to be a Tim Burton replica of a classic story; where-in fact it is more of an interpretation of a collection of nonsensical poetic literature. The story definitely falters from the original in many ways, but I reiterate that this film is not intended to be a remake per se of the classic children’s book. I wouldn’t exactly call it a sequel either; that would be ‘Through the Looking Glass, and What Alice Found There’. Let’s give this movie a tangent quality, since it is more based off the lyrics of one of Carroll’s many poems; “Jabberwocky”. Yes, the monstrous dragon-like creature that Alice must ultimately battle toward the end of the film. The newer model has many equivalant factors of the original story, as does the Disney classic we all know and love, but takes place after the original story. It follows a more heroic, mature path in which Alice returns to Wonderland only to become victim to the hands of fate which lead her to conquer the Red Queen and her devilish ways by battling the Jabberwocky.

This plot is clearly a huge adaptation Burton ensued in a risky, yet courageous manner. Quite honestly the story has little inspirational or dramatic quality to it, but does provide a simple path to follow that resembles many fantasy flicks. What seems to be the biggest problems for many are that Burton didn’t follow the outline of the original story nor maintain Carroll’s lack of sensibility. Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland is classified as literary nonsense. It is a story that really has nothing to do with much of anything and more or less lacks an actual story (beginning, middle, and end). Of course there is this time line within the tale, but nothing really connects or is relevant to any other event. There is no struggle or goal of the story. It’s simply meant to be silly and enjoyable. I can agree that Burton’s Wonderland falls short of this concept, but the truth is that our modern culture needs a story. We are so invested in purpose and reason that another movie that just doesn’t add up or make sense would seem to be a waste of time to many (including myself). Before writing this review I took the time to watch the Disney classic. I will tell you that the movie really doesn’t mean anything or make much of any sense. I journeyed upon a consistent flow of confusion and typical Disney musical flavor until I came to the conclusion that this story is more of a literal dream than that of a sensible build up to a climactic finish.  I understand this was the purpose, but I found myself somewhat frustrated and ultimately a little more appeased by the rendition Burton presented in (for me) 3-D. Let it be known, I am not hating on the great Disney efforts or the verbose riddles of Carroll for I am, myself, quite the promoter of sensible nonsense. I simply enjoyed Burton’s film more for its amazing aesthetics and dark charm.

You may have noticed that I claimed to provide an unbiased review. I’m clearly biased in my opinion towards the movie, but I’ve used this term because it is only after I’ve seen the film that I can be biased. I have not allowed the media-marketing scandalmongers to preview and seemingly enlighten my mind to what this movie should fulfill. Nor have I allocated any space in my mind to assume this film should be exactly what the Disney classic proclaims to be, an animated version of the story (note that Disney’s rendition is quite inaccurate as well). The Disney version definitely has many aspects that don’t appear in the classic ‘Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland’. One such example can be seen by looking at the character list; tweedle-dee and tweedle-dum don’t even appear in the book, yet they appear in the animation. I’m not sure any movie has ever really perfectly portrayed its literary companion, but the Disney interpretation definitely maintained its lack of sensibility quite well. Tim Burton’s Wonderland, I found to be very clever in its subtle ways. Unfortunately his efforts may take a little more research and time for people to understand. Taking aspects from the original story, poems and themes of the sequel and a kick of Burton’s own originality; he mends and mashes Carroll’s cunning in way that blends and crashes effortlessly through the art Burton presents as viewers are enveloped at 30 frames per second.

So, I must say the gun-jumping on this film has been thus far premature. In my opinion, we all need to approach the cinema with much less expectation and preview. It’s great to know what’s coming out, but that minute or two glimpse into the future presents a constant predicament. This predicament is one of too much hope and desire for a vicarious sense of pleasure with which we all have no control. I often find that the best previews are the simplest, leaving out all the spice and nerve-tingling goodness while providing just enough mystery to intrigue and leave one dangling. Really though, I believe the best preview is none (especially of a movie for which one would presume to know the story).

I am very curious though, to see what movies you think actually lived up to their previewed value.

Also, what did you think of Burton’s Alice in Wonderland? (likes/dislikes)

Heroes of Gaia is a Flash-based game set in the world of Gaia a land rich in resources, monsters and magical equipment. You start by choosing a look for your hero and then quickly proceed to your town hall. The objective of the game is to build your fame by completing tasks and expanding your kingdom through exploration and upgrades on your town.

The heroes in this town are recruited from your town tavern. Makes sense that’s usually were adventures head when they are traveling through a strange city. Upgrade your tavern to a nicer more top of the line version and you can recruit higher level heroes. Apparently the heroes in Gaia will only show up as long as your city tavern is up to par with the finest in dining and entertainment.

The game offers a wide variety of upgrades, monsters and tasks to work on. So I rolled my sleeves up and started upgrading and fighting and then …. I ran out of money…..At this point Heroes of Gaia comes to a screeching halt. I decided to ask other players for help only to find out that you can not speak in world chat until you have reached a certain amount of fame. I can’t imagine why new players would not be able to ask for help?!?

Combat involves a terrible Flash animation of chess piece-like blobs moving across what looks like the terrain art from the original Legend of Zelda. The game takes care of all the action and requires no actual skill. I use this time to go to the restroom, make a sandwich or play another game..

There are some intriguing ideas in the game. Unfortunately, the game play is too slow and the combat too uninvolving to keep my interest for more than an afternoon. Because there is nothing original about the game style and their subtle attempt at duping you into spending money to make the game go faster is almost offensive. I don’t think I will be missing out on too much. I might consider playing something like this if there was something available in an Iphone or android application. When it comes to free MMO’s I will stick with Dungeons and Dragons online.

In the interest of full disclosure, I must confess that Martin Scorsese is the reason I worship at the altar of Cinema.  I find his manic love for film completely adorable and believe his finest works are timeless and uncompromising testaments to the integrity of American cinema.

That being said, Shutter Island, his latest film and his fourth collaboration with Leonardo DiCaprio, showcases a very healthy helping of the cinematic know-how that has endeared him to so many for so many years.  Whether the film soars or suffers under the wings of his expertise is clearly a subject for debate.  My own fave, A.O. Scott of the New York Times comes down against this particular piece.  BUT.  For the FIRST TIME EVER, ladies and gentlemen… I only mostly agree (But A.O.’s spoiler-free review is superb and hilarious as always, and everyone should read it whether you agree or not).

The mood-drenched noir-ness, though entirely deliberate, is admittedly pretty heavy-handed and distracting in its real-time experience (also borderline infuriating.  Easy on the cellos, please).  And the meticulous detail, while important, also transforms Shutter Island into more of a cerebral exercise in form and technique than a conventional motion picture. There is a coldness that permeates through the film that will probably not sit well with many audiences and the stylistic choices do not allow for many moments of empathy because we’re too busy trying to figure out what the hell is going on.  Yes, it’s a moody monster of a movie (say that three times fast), which may not necessarily make for a better or more enjoyable experience, but it does make it interesting.

It is a widely (nearly unanimously) accepted premise that Martin Scorsese speaks film better than any filmmaker alive and working today.  And one of the benefits of dissecting a Scorsese film, especially at this stage of his long career, is the luxury of diving directly into the minutia of his work.  Because everything we see and hear is there for a reason. As the story resolves and the narrative trajectory becomes clear, the journey suddenly turns tragic, a shift that is actually beautifully handled by his star (Leo got game).  But it’s this last piece that serves as the central foundation, a revelation that actually diffused some of my frustrations about the film as a whole.  The doom and gloom that hangs over most of it morphs into something else entirely and there is something to be said for stepping back and admiring the mathematical precision of its execution.  The pieces don’t just come together, the puzzle itself changes shape.

I think the biggest problem people will have with it is that it isn’t The Departed — which… look, I get it.  The Departed kicks major ass, okay.  And Scorsese undoubtedly spins movie-gold when he’s wading in the gutters of society.  Shutter Island seems void of the extra jolt that gives his other work that no-bullshit attitude, largely because Shutter is a tale of isolation.  And it lacks the poetic ambiance of Taxi Driver (another isolationist narrative), because it also functions as a mystery.  The final verdict hinges mostly on personal taste, and the film definitely appeals to the problem-solving part of my brain.  It’ll be interesting to see where it falls after a second viewing.  But a classic motion picture experience, it probably won’t be for most people.

But Marty’s still a genius.  So there.

Somewhere between the highly-polished, subscription-based gameplay of MMORPGs like World of Warcraft and the simple, free offerings on sites like Newgrounds.com, lies the relatively new domain of the “freemuim” game.

Most, like the wildly popular Farmville, make the bulk of their content available free and offer the option to trade real-life money for small in-game enhancements. Lords of Evil ostensibly works on this same principle, but does it very, very badly.

The gameplay and premise are vaguely reminiscent of old-school fantasy strategy games like Master of Magic and their more recent counterparts like Age of Wonders. You assume the role of all-powerful leader, presumably appointed Dictator For Life by your adoring minions, and have a choice of three races: orc, demon, or human. This choice influences what kind of buildings and units you will have access to as the game progresses.

Gameplay consists of using your resource generating buildings to produce enough gold, lumber, and ore to allow you to upgrade your buildings and construct more advanced buildings, which in turn allow you to build military units and attack your fellow players. This is all managed through an intimidatingly unintuitive series of specialized menus, and a simple representation of your growing city is displayed in a small window at the middle of the screen.

While this kind of dense, difficult simulation likely won’t appeal to a broad audience, it could still ably fill a small gaming niche were it not for one other consideration: time.

If waiting is the nemesis of fun (and it usually is), then Lords of Evil is the rocket-launcher-wielding Nazi-robot-demon of fun. It took me almost two hours of clicking an upgrade button to reach the point where military units became available, and even after finally building the barracks needed to produce zombies (yes, zombies come from a barracks), it took me another couple hours just to crank out five of the little bastards.

During all of this waiting, there is literally nothing to do but watch the building countdown timers and fiddle around with the included maze mini-game; it says a lot that the developers felt it necessary to include a second game whose sole purpose is to distract players while they wait for something to happen in the main game. Sitting several hours waiting for lumberyards to be upgraded doesn’t seem particularly evil or lordly, and it isn’t very much fun, either.

Users aren’t charged for playing (if one could even call it ‘play’) the game this way, but the only way to speed things up is to spend real money on in-game currency in the form of gems. Buying these gems doesn’t open up any new content or add anything to the game experience, it merely uncripples the core mechanics by allowing you to cast “spells” whose only function is to make shit happen faster. This kind of shameless cash-grab in a “free” MMO is, frankly, a bit insulting.

If the game’s near-vertical learning curve and unplayably plodding pace isn’t bad enough, its poorly translated text, abysmal graphics, clunky user interface, and uninspired art should drive off all but the most self-abusive of players. Lords of Evil is the poster child for everything that can go wrong with a “freemium” game, and should be avoided by anyone who doesn’t hate fun.

Kwon: <Sigh>  Okay.  I understand why people were excited about this movie, although I was less excited than most.  And I get why people are impressed by it.  Though again…  I mean, fine.  Yay you, James Cameron, you built your own camera.  And your computer graphics team did some fantastic work.  Who doesn’t want to fly on a dragon?  Or frolic in a giant awesome tree?  Or you know, live on another planet?  Yes, Pandora is beautiful.  And it’s all appropriately dreamlike and fantastical and yes, your crackpot visual team did its job.  But Avatar still smells like Pocahontas: Attack of the Blue Aliens/Dances With Ferngully/The Last of the Immoral Slaughtering of An Indigenous People. Despite moments of real ingenuity, the 3D extravagance merely serves as a gimmicky distraction.

Juan: This was supposed to be “the re-definition of moviemaking for the next century”, and I had expectations… big expectations. Afterward, I kept wondering if I had been watching a 3d movie at all. Once a discussion began on the immersive nature of what had been done I started to change my mind, but my expectation of a complete sensory overload was left wanting. Avatar decided to be subtle about its usage of the groundbreaking medium, and arguably became the standard by which 3d films should be made. I watched the movie anticipating revelation, and was served blue guys that smacked of fakery. It took me a good 30 minutes to ‘believe’, and even then it was mostly because I was tired of squirming.

Kwon: There are a handful of affecting moments, courtesy of a well-cast ensemble (Zoe Saldana successfully demystifies the puzzle of green/blue screen acting).  But why resort to such a blatant morality-by-numbers tale?  The villains/antagonists/vessel for evil are so evil, it’s totally boring.  Do they really need to be so monomaniacal?  I mean, the guy that’s after all the martian rocks may as well have been wearing a three-piece suit fashioned out of printed currency.  And his military henchman’s hatefulness is alarmingly excessive.  Why does he want to kill everyone so much?

Juan: Disagreed! I love how Cameron creates archetypal bile ridden characters. Something in him just loves the concept of yin and yang too much. They’re not believable, but they are fun to watch.

Kwon: That single-minded menace works when your villain is a robot… and called The Terminator.  But it’s pretty ridiculous on a human face.  Even in a ‘Popcorn Flick’ like this one.  I mean, they didn’t even try that in Ferngully.  The bad guy in that was a ginormous cloud of greasy smoke, for crying out loud.

Juan: The first half of the film tried my patience multiple times. I kept on wondering when the movie was going to begin. James, it took you decades to write this film, what were you doing the whole time? Rather than a story I received a pastiche of scenes that are more focused on the mystery of Pandora. In the end, the movie was more about the world than the people. In a society where films have a shelf life that gets exhausted somewhat quickly compared to video games, an IP on all platforms must be created. So from a marketing perspective I get this film now, and there have been successful franchises (Star Wars, TMNT, Ghostbusters, et al), and failed abominations (The Matrix), but rest assured that universe creation will be revolutionized here. The innovations in disturbingly blurred realities will become the topic of journalism for years to come, and my guess is Avatar will set the bar like it just did for 3D.

Kwon:  Visual advancements in film are no small accomplishment.  The techy geniuses who pull those strings are all incredibly gifted people and the job requires an immense amount of patience (word is one of the guys who did the SFX for Food, Inc. was in need of a well deserved vaycay, due to the demands placed on his mortal frame).  It’s exciting to be swept away by innovation.  But Cameron falls victim to the all too predictable trap of, perhaps not abusing the technology, but certainly exhausting its impressiveness.  I enjoyed the visual tour of Pandora.  But the more I got away from it, the more I started to forget, and eventually not care, about the visual awesomeness.  And therein lies the problem.  If the dudes at Pixar can animate the entirety of a film (and make computer fur move like fur!) and still write the shit out of the story, then Cameron could have at least attempted to muster the same ambition for his screenplay that he did for his photography.

Juan: And I’m actually going to disagree on the photography because I wasn’t that impressed.  Maybe I’m disagreeing less specifcially with Cameron’s film and more with the CG super-epic genre as a whole. Does it ever strike you odd that directors worry less about physical connection? The wide acceptance of ‘suspend your disbelief’ in filmmaking is one of the more frightening trends today. Watching a feature like Avatar is a harsh reminder of how difficult embracing 3d elements as reality is. Many times the film plays out like a scoreboard in my head where I’m ticking off ‘good’ or ‘bad’. In many ways the game becomes more important than watching the film itself, and later on at the bar the obligatory conversation ensues.  That aside, there is something about a nice little shaky cam in 3d that really helps me engage. Cameron, see District 9 for a real cinematographic tour de force, and take some notes for next time! While you’re at it check out BSG or Firefly for shooting spaceships. I get it, 3d realized in this way is important, but man was I underwhelmed.

Kwon:  Not so much in disagreement, actually.  I concur on the quality of the actual avatars in Avatar.  And this usually tends to be one of Cameron’s biggest shortfalls, and one that cannot be remedied by necessitating astronomical video-rendering times.  There is a notable deficit of emotive connectivity that has little to do with graphic detail or how ‘real’ his avatars look.  I felt infinitely more bonded to the stop-motion figures of Wes Anderson’s Fantastic Mr. Fox, a film in which the characters have little more facial movement beyond the bearing of teeth and the raising of an eyebrow.  And while I was certainly taken by the visual landscape in Cameron’s film, I never felt I was watching anything that was vastly and/or wholly superior.

Juan: I’m with you ~ there is something so natural about puppets like the ones in Fantastic Mr. Fox. I think to myself, “Those are puppets and that’s okay because they can still make me cry”. Anyways, sometimes I feel like the zeitgeist behind Cameron films is what makes it huge not the movie itself. Would we all really be having a conversation about how this movie “changed film forever” if we hadn’t been told to? I can’t shake the feeling of being abused by an overactive media culture that forces conversation on me. It’s useful to have something to say at the water cooler, but I still like the concept of ‘me’. It’s frustrating to think that my likes aren’t things I would choose independently.  But I digress and it doesn’t change the fact that J-Cam is a douche.

Kwon:  Yeah.  And here’s where I break from diplomacy and bear my claws.  WTF, Golden Globes, you should be embarrassed.  I thought you were all critics.  I’m truly baffled.  Perhaps many of you are still enduring the shame of shafting last year’s blockbuster-that-was-actually-a-real-movie-and-deserved-to-be-acknowledged (The Dark Knight).  And you should be.  But this blatant overcompensation does not bode well for your already compromised reputation.  And James.  Seriously.  The speech.  “Give it up for yourselves!”  Translation: Yes, give it up for the fact that we (I) have such good fortune that we (I) can spend this night congratulating ourselves (myself) for being so successful (rich). I know you can’t really help it.  I’ve seen enough of your interviews to know that pretty much everything you say is laced with megalomaniacal ego… so I wasn’t that surprised.  But I actually LOOKED AWAY FROM MY TV, I was so overcome with third-party embarrassment.

Juan: I literally started laughing during his speech. Cameron is like an alien trying to understand what a human might say, and I wonder if there is a serious social problem kept under wraps by his publicists. I mean, who accepts an award, and immediately slaps everyone whoever tried to get an award in the face. Cameron that’s who. Man, I can’t think of a more dick line than what he said, and that’s taking into consideration his Titanic speech. Did you see Leo DiCaprio’s face during it? I felt like we were kindred spirits thinking “man, what a cock”. Exactly Leo, exactly.

Kwon: Okay, I’m gonna go vomit now.  My apologies to the graphics team behind Avatar.  You’re all aces.

Holy Mother of Jackie Chan, yes. I’m sort of angry at everyone I know that nobody took the time to alert me that this trailer was available. It wasn’t until this week when I turned the corner on my way to work  and saw the three story ad boasting “Rock Out with Your Glock Out” that I knew we had a winner on our hands.

Like all of you, I’m sure, I love a good interracial cop comedy! I actually watched a Lethal Weapon this weekend, I watch National Security whenever it’s on TV,  I even watched 48 Hours the other day (side note: Eddie Murphy’s IMDB has a note for an “Untitled Eddie Murphy Romeo & Juliet Project” hardly the authority on romance, Eddie). Initially, I’m cautious, and I really am holding myself to my grudge against Kevin Smith since he rigged the Best Week Ever 90’s movie poll . I see two possible problems with Cop Out. One, Tracy Morgan pretty much plays the same guy in everything. I’m not sick of it, I’m still very happy with his performances, but it just concerns me that he’s not branching out. I’m similarly concerned about the cast of Mad Men… can they only play characters from Mad Men? If I can find a tv role where I just get to be one character and then transform that role into movies and SNL appearances, could I win a Golden Globe?

Second problem, when did Bruce Willis start actually looking like a 54 year old man? He was on Letterman the other day in a Jets jersey and he looked older than Brett Favre did in a Jets jersey, and that’s really hard to do. I’m concerned that Bruce is living on an all micro-biotic veggie diet to improve his blood pressure, when really I think he might just need a cheeseburger.

The saving grace? Seann William Scott. Where have you been ( I just wrote beeeen and now the word been looks weird and I had to google and my head hurts) ? Why are there two n’s in Seann? I’m getting super sidetracked talking about this movie… Touché, Cop Out that’s exactly what I’m supposed to do! Cop Out will make light of the dangers in our society and make us feel at ease (unlike, I don’t know, Surrogates) you’re not in it for great dialogue, you’re in it for the simple fun of it. I’m not going to watch this movie in the theater. But I AM going to watch it on TBS a billion Sunday mornings in a row, it’s going to remind me that I need to purchase the Shanghai Knights/Noon DVDs. I’m going to order Dominos and probably donates to the Deanne Favre Hope Foundation. Movies like this are insanely watchable, incredibly additive, and I’m not ashamed to say I’ll continue to be a cop com fan for many years to come!

Three Stars!