Top Ten Wedding Party Dos

By Peter Brauer

I just went to a fantastic wedding. The pic is of the happy couple, my cousin and her man. I will not bore you with details, but I had about as much fun as you can have in 24 hours. On the drive back to the city I had a long talk with my cousins about how to create such a perfect storm of wedding party. Best as I can figure it these are the 10 most essential things needed to have the best wedding ever.

Please note: This is my list, and do not be offended if your wedding does not, did not, or will not include these elements. I know people can be touchy about weddings.

10. Great food. Everyone likes good eating. Everyone has a different idea of what that means, but good food is good food.

9. Short Ceremony. This is a really important first step to any successful wedding. Get the formalities out of the way, because aside from you, your parents, and your spouse no one really enjoys this part too much. I mean I always get teary eyed at this point, but who wants to cry for hours. That is sad. Also sitting still is tiring.

8. Toasts during dinner. Give toasts while everyone has food in front of their faces. This is vital. There are definitely moments during any toasting session that lose people. When someone’s mind momentarily wanders it is much better they think mmmm lobster is good, than damn this guy needed a speech coach.

7. Get a tent. I don’t know why, but wedding receptions in tents are better. It is because you are outside, don’t care if you spill your drink, and it means there is no property owner to stop your fun at certain hour.

6. Dance floor. Spend some money on your dance planning. Make sure your can be very loud. Make sure your music choice will elicit the proper type of bumping and grinding for your guests. I find the dance is when people cross the tipsy to drunk threshold.

5. Body of water. Lets face it there is no better ice breaker that skinny dipping. I have been at two wedding receptions with hots tubs on the premises. At both weddings if found myself eyeball to nipple. Pools, lakes, oceans, and rivers all serve this same purpose. Get wet!

4. Single People of both sexes. If you don’t have a good ratio of single male and female friends, your party will go bust. These single people are a vital part of your wedding. After your beautiful ceremony gets them riled and sentimental they will be the life of your party.

3. No end time. The wedding night should not have a clear ending. In this environment only the strong survive until the wee hours when the true free spirits come out. Getting a tent on a lawn generally makes it easier to have no end time. Make sure you reception location is some where capable to hosting an all night party.

2. Open Bar. Duh right, but believe it or not some people don’t figure this out. People should be supplied with ample beverage by a bartender during the official reception. However it is vital that when older folks start heading home the bar remains open for the die hards. Drunk people mix great drinks.

1. A complete disregard for everyone but yourself. Ultimately weddings are about the bride and groom. During the wedding you will not have opportunity to catch up, hang out, or make sure anyone is happy. Therefore you should waste no time doing those things. Do exactly as you please and have a great time. Best I figure it you are like a king and queen. Like old mid evil lore, a happy king and queen make a happy nation. You must lead by example. Every one else will be happy when they see you are happy. No one would remember King Arther if he was a sour puss at the round table.